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Dear Shadow

Dear Shadow,

 

Why must you be so dark?  On one side of me the sun shines like a burning mass, and on the other a dark unyielding shape lurks.  You are seething with loneliness, and so utterly distraught.  Where I seek out connection, you sever the binds and shackle me to a darkness not unlike that of a dungeon.  I suffer from your endless dejection.  You are always there, breathing, whispering, uttering, hissing, and chiding me along a path where I feel shattered.  I feel like you’re watching me, just waiting for the first opportunity to jump in and pump my subconscious full of rank insecurities.

Why must you hate me?  Without me there would be no you.  You are me, a part that I keep in the dark.  You are stuck behind me, following me through the star-speckled abyss.

As I turn, you move.  As I whirl, you dodge.  I look for you, trying to understand you.  But the more I seek, the more I find myself baffled by the sleek evasive measures you use to avoid being seen.

 

But then again, there isn’t a me without you.  I’m torn at the thought of losing you.  I imagine severing you from my being, but you’re so engrained in me that I can’t imagine a life without you.

You creep up at the least opportune moments.  You haunt me, with your endless self-loathing.

 

I pray for the day you leave me alone.  Like a stalker, you’re always one step ahead; you creep out when the sunlight shines and envelopes me.  Where there’s light, there’s always you, standing right there behind me.

 

Maybe one day I’ll find you, open you up, and poke at your insides with my curiosity.

Maybe I’ll dissect your motives.  Crack you open and peer through the hard vale of darkness.

I don’t really want to separate from you; I’m just insecure and I’m afraid of what will become of your daunting vise.  I want to know you, turn you from a stranger to a friend, an enemy to a lover; turn you from a shadow to an open forum.

 

I’ll see you around,

Jeremy Void

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